Decisions & Excuses

So, judging from my lack of blogging, you've probably guessed that I've pretty much failed again at my weight loss goals. I've been thinking about this all day - what happened?  

Well, you know the drill, all gung-ho for the first few weeks, then life gets in the way, and health & fitness get pushed to the backburner again... and before I know it, it's been ages since I worked out or written down what I've been eating.  Yet again.  FAILED.

I can't count how many times I've done this to myself.  I know I need to be healthy for "me" & to ensure that I'm there for my family.  I need to be a good example for my kids, and have enough energy to play with them.  I know I need to exercise and treat my body better.  I know I deserve it, but why can't I do it?

I have my reasons (well, excuses I guess).  I work two jobs, plus have my sewing on the side.  I have two beautiful girls that require a lot of attention and care.  I have a loving husband who also needs to be looked after at times.  We have a house that needs cleaning, groceries to buy, meals to make, games to play, etc etc.  

By the time I get up in the morning, get the kids ready to go to school/daycare, and get myself ready, it's time for me to go to work.  After a long day at work, I come home, make dinner, eat, clean up, help with homework, play with the girls, give them baths, get them ready for bed, read stories, and tuck them in.  By the time that's all done, I am so exhausted and just want to cherish the few minutes I have to myself before I drag myself off to bed as well.  And then it starts all over again.

I know I need to make time for exercise, but it is so hard.  I work too much.  I'm missing out on my girls' growing up, all of the fun things they get to do with people who barely know us (daycare).  I should be there for them, playing with them, teaching them, holding them when the need me.  I have a huge decision to make.  I want to stop working so damn much!  I am hoping now that my husband is working at a better paying job, that I can finally cut back on my hours.  I'm getting burned out, depressed, resentful, and grouchy.  And I'm neglecting myself.  Mommy guilt... it sucks.

So I have re-written my goals.  Some of these may have to wait until end of August, as I've picked up quite a few extra shifts at the hospital over the summer and can't give those back any longer.  

New goals:

- I will work only a maximum of 4 days a week

- I will make time to exercise a minimum of 3 days a week 

- I will make time every day to play with my girls and enjoy them

- I will take time to make meals healthier, for me and for my family

- I will set a good example for my girls

- I will become leaner and fitter

- I will continue to sew, as it is my passion, and grow my business

- I will make time for my husband and I to spend together

I'm going to add to the list as things come up.  I will mark things off as I go.

So buh-bye mommy guilt.... Hello Happy Laura... *sigh*

Week 2 Results

Here are my measurements for end of week 2, start of week 3:

(Numbers in brackets is change compared to last week)

Weight: 167.6 lbs (-1.8 lbs)

Body Fat: 19 on calipers  = 28.2% (-1.4%) - not sure how accurate my measuring is

Smallest Part of Waist: 34" (-0.5")

Waist around bellybutton: 36.5" (-0.75")

Hip: 39.75" (-0.5")

Thigh: 22.25" (0.5")

Calf: 14" (-0.25")

Under Breast: 34.5" (-2.5") (I think this is wrong)

Over Breast: 39.75" (-0.75")

Arm: 11" (same)

Neck: 13" (same)

Total inches lost: 5.75"

Wow!  Not bad considering I didn't really exercise much this week!  Imagine if I had actually done my workouts every day!  Gotta get back to exercising... if there was some way to make it more fun instead of dreading it!!

Week 1 Results

Took my measurements today after 1 week - in brackets is comparison to last week's measurements:

Weight: 169.4  (-0.8)

Body Fat: 20 mm (same as last week)

Waist (smallest part) : 34.5" (-0.5")

Waist (at bellybutton): 37.25" (-0.5")

Hips: 40.25" (same)

Thigh: 22.75" (same)

Calf: 14.25" (same)

Chest (under breast): 37" (same)

Chest (over breast): 40.5" (-1.5" - I think I may have messed up my starting measurements)

Arm (bicep): 11" (same)

Neck: 13" (-0.25")

Total Loss in inches: 2.75"

So I guess some loss in weight & inches is good - I'm happy with that.  I have to amp up the exercise now and try not to hurt myself in the process!

Have an awesome week!

Finally Recovered...

Okay, well I knew I was out of shape, but WOW!  I did the first video in the P90X series "Chest & Back" on Tuesday morning.  I know I totally sucked on the push ups - but WTF is up with the "Dive Bomber Push-up?"  Whomever invented that one should seriously be shot!   Anyhow, the back exercises we okay, I used the bands, as I didn't have my pull up bar unpacked from the box yet (yes I know, it's been a month since I got it).  Okay workout finished. 

I had some extra time & a little bit of energy left so decided to do the "Ab Ripper X" that was at the end of the DVD - 20 minutes of Ab exercises - no problem... or so I thought!  After much grunting, moaning and cursing, I finally made it through the longest 20 minutes of my life.  Those jerks on the DVD make it look so bloody easy!  Fooled me! 

Next morning, was a little sore, upper body/arms mostly, which was expected - then on Thursday: OMG, what is this pain?!?  I haven't been this sore E-V-E-R!  I thought I was going to die - my triceps were so sore I barely even lift my arms high enough to put a shirt on!  Okay, I had a visit with my friend, Aleve, and things were so-so for the rest of the day.  Thought I would take it easy and put off my workout for that day.  Then came Friday - Holy crap - I think I pulled my groin!  Man, it felt like someone had ripped my legs out of their hip sockets and tore whatever muscles there are down there.  Soooooo painful! 

It this for real?  Does anybody else feel this sore after doing a P90X workout?  I thought I had a high pain tolerance, as I've given birth twice (once with no drugs) and if I managed that then this seriously couldn't be that bad.  So this week has pretty much been a write-off for exercise.  I managed to do fairly well eating, my only cheat was a Timmy's Double Double yesterday.

So back to square one & will be trying the "Plyometrics" video tomorrow. Wish me luck!

Tonight I will also be re-writing my goals as I need to remember why I am subjecting myself to this torture, lol!

Day 2

Well, I had to work at 7 A.M. today - way too early for my taste - so I obviously didn't have time to work out before work.  I was so tired all day at work and glad when I finally got to leave.  Made dinner for the family and had to take my daughter to soccer practice.  Just got home around 8 then had to help her with homework then get ready for bed.

Had my husband take some "before" photos of me - I think I must have some sort of "reverse body dysmorphic disorder" as I honestly didn't think I look that bad, until I saw the photos... very eye-opening and motivated me even more to lose this flab! 

I think I did pretty good with eating today:

Breakfast - 2 Shredded Wheat with Kefir, banana, water, black coffee
Snack - Oatmeal w/ Vanilla Protein Powder, Orange
Lunch - Ryvita Crackers with Peanut Butter, Apple, Small Balkan Yogurt
Snack - 1 cup Kefir
Dinner - 1/2 c. rice, Small Pork Tenderloin, Zucchini
Snack - Orange

Drank lots of water today - felt good about that

I definitely need to add more veggies to the menu - must go grocery shopping tomorrow.

I am pretty sore from working in the yard all day yesterday, and also tired from waking up so early today, but overall feel ok.  Tomorrow should be better, as I work later in the day and will have time for my workout in the morning & then meal prep.

Day 1 - Reality Check

Thanks to Cindy for kicking my butt into gear, and motivating me to finally doing something about this junk in my trunk!  Look out Pharmacy - here we come - Ka-Chow!

Okay so this is day one of my body transformation!  Yikes!  Big things ahead...

I am taking part in the Burn the Fat Challenge - check it out!

98 days for transform your body and possibly win a trip to Maui!  Sounds like motivation to me!!

Took my measurements this morning:

Weight: 170.2 lbs

Waist (at belly button): 37.75"

Waist (smallest part): 35"

Arms (bicep): 11"

Chest (under breast): 37"

Chest (over breast): 42"

Hips: 40.25"

Upper Thighs (around chub rub, lol): 22.75"

Calves: 14.25"

Neck: 13.25"

Pounds of Fat: 50.37 lbs

I also measured my body fat using the Accu-Measure Calipers & came up with a measurement of "20", which for my age group translates to 29.6% body fat - Eww!  This is borderline overweight, and I'm never going to have this much body fat again!

I am also picking up a body fat scale today so will be using that to measure my body fat as well.

I'm 33 years old, 5' 7" - so at this time, my goal is to lose

I will be using mostly the P90X program for my fitness portion for the first bit of this transformation, then will incorporate more weights and cardio at my gym when I get more fit (and have more time).

I will be following the Burn the Fat, Feed the Muscle program, developed by Tom Venuto as a no-nonsense & straightforward approach to achieving your ultimate body.  I have the e-book and it's awesome, especially for his methods of motivation & goal setting.

I will take some photos later today, once I've actually gotten a little more prettied up (gotta look half-decent with the fat photos, lol!)

So I will be blogging daily about my progress, daily menus, exercise, etc. as a challenge to myself to stay motivated and on track.  I don't know if anybody is actually going to read this blog or not, but I am putting myself out there and making myself accountable to somebody.  

I can and will do this, and I'm sick of being fat, tired, achy, sick, and generally gross!

Thanks for joining me & please leave any comments / questions you may have!